November 7, 2004

There are things that drift away like our endless, numbered days

I can't help but feeling like I'm at a point in my life where something needs to happen or something needs to change. There come these times every so often in my life that I feel like things are beginning to stagnate and if I don't do something about it I'm going to be stuck where I am forever. Usually I have no idea what it is that I want to happen or what it is that I think needs to change. A lot of time I get the feeling that all of this stems from the fact that I just have a hard time being content with the state of my life. I always feel like there is something more that I could be doing or more out there that I could be experiencing. This is a good way to ward off complacency, I suppose, but it also makes it hard to be happy with my life as it is. I know I have a lot to be happy about. I have a good family and a lot of friends that I really enjoy being with. There is just someting that's missing from my life though. I was thinking about this the other day and I realized that what I really want is someone who will care about me as much as I care about them. Not that I don't have friends and family that do care about me, but I'm talking about something different. I want to know that I have a purpose to my life other than myself. When I was thinking about this before I realized that some of this anxiety my find its root in my troubled, if not atrophied relationship with God. I don't want to get all religious here so I'll just leave that point at that. I guess I'd just like to be able to count on the fact that someone is thinking about me. Maybe that's self-centered. I don't know.

SONG OF THE MOMENT:

Straylight Run - Existentialism on Prom Night

Posted by dpetrella at November 7, 2004 3:14 PM | TrackBack
Comments
Post a comment









Remember personal info?