April 4, 2006
Here's Your Sign, Asshole
People, you need to listen to me on this one. When you are waiting to get on an elevator, wait for the people to get out before you get on. Seriously. There is no reason, outside of you being an asshole, to push your way through the exiting crowd simply to be the first on the elevator. If you're in such a big hurry that you're willing to look like an asshole, then you've graduated to the level of stupid asshole. Let's apply a little brainpower here (I know it hurts, bear with me).
The elevator door acts as a bottleneck between the elevator and the lobby. If you don't believe me, go measure it. The people inside the elevator are attempting to move out of the elevator through said bottleneck. The people waiting to board also need to move through the bottleneck, but in the opposite direction. Since the elevator is much smaller than than the lobby, there is no way anybody can get in the elevator (assuming it's at capacity) until someone gets out of the elevator. Because of this, we wait for the passengers to exit the elevator before the others get on. When you place your dumb ass directly in the middle of said bottleneck, they can't exit the elevator as fast, so you actually end up waiting longer to get to your destination. I'll repeat it so it sinks in. When you push through the crowd to get on the elevator before everyone has exited, you make it take longer. Your stupid asshole-ish methods have made you even more late. Nice one.