May 30, 2005


The imagery of this amused me.

"That's you Allison, you've always got all of your ducks in a row."

My mother said this to me on the phone the other night. She was referring to my seemingly well thought out plans on leaving school and moving back to IL.

Little did she know that what she saw as ducks in a row in a pond was actually a few rubber ducks in a bathtub held together in a line with a fuse that led to a box of dynamite.

I am supposed to be the child who knows what she is doing, who doesn't mess up. In reality the only thing I am is highly capable of concocting good cover stories. My aunt refers to her son doing well in high school and going to a good college as "taking the Allison track." I always wonder if these people actually realize that I am a college drop-out. Because when you take away the "going to vet school" I am not transferring, I am dropping out.

But I guess that's the point, making it seem like you know what you're doing. Even if I'm flying from the seat of my pants most of the time, all the rest of the world sees is the fact that I'm wearing the pants. Great.

Posted by allison at May 30, 2005 9:22 AM

Pants!! We all make it up as we go along. Everyone does. Check that - everyone who is in charge of their own lives makes it up as they go along. You know, all that "life is a journey" malarky. Its not bs, it makes sense.

I'm still trying to decide where I'll be in a year. But don't tell anyone that.

Posted by: matty at June 5, 2005 10:52 PM
Post a comment

Remember personal info?